A few days ago, I found myself in a state of a complete emotional disarray. It was as if I lost my reason for living, I lost my sense of purpose. ..
I felt defeated. ..
I chose to disconnect myself to the people around me and locked myself in my room. I drowned myself in tears and prayed to God to just take my life.
I sat in my bed shaking while sobbing, “I am tired!” I told myself over and over.
I was a complete mess.
The pain of being in a detrimental relationship has finally taken its toll on me. I have simply reached my breaking point.
For a long time I forgot to love myself and focused my attention on saving a relationship that is meant to end from the very beginning. I chose to blind myself with all the warning signs, I chose not to listen to my friends’ advice, I chose to forgive and give him chances after chances even after being cheated on a few times. I kept my mouth shut and chose to believe all his lies. I simply gave him the freedom of being able to hurt me for as much as he can.
He was free to do whatever he desires, acting as if I do not exist. I begged for recognition but he chose to brush me off so many times.
I felt so insecure, unwanted and helpless.
Until one day God spoke to me, He reminded me on how precious life is and it’ll be a waste to throw it all away for someone whose not worth it. He gave me a chance to start over, a new beginning to a more beautiful journey.
And so today I’ve decided to move on… To continue living and to build a new dream. To embrace happiness over sorrow. To smile rather than cry.
Looking back, I learned that life will sometimes introduce you to people who will leave a permanent scar in your being, people who can cause you so much self destruction and so much pain. Yet in the end these people can teach you great life lessons and will help you to become a better person. They will mold you into a better version of yourself.
So instead of being bitter about a past relationship or experience, I learned that everything that we are going through has a greater purpose, so we have to bravely accept every challenges and know that hardships are not permanent.
Pain is not constant.
Suffering does not last.
Difficulties do end.
So do not lose hope!
I would like to end this by saying life is beautiful! !!
Whatever the circumstances we are in now, whatever pain we have will soon end. Do not give up and continue fighting! Never allow anyone to destroy your dreams and future.
You hold the key to your own happiness.
So get up, make good memories, smile and live.
Arlene Kischaen Aboli